


Ricordando il Passato

by Lanii



Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Genre: F/F, the hand holding scene in rebellion really got to me ok
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-11
Updated: 2014-10-11
Packaged: 2018-02-20 17:39:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2437241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lanii/pseuds/Lanii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Oktavia von Seckendorff. It always has been. It always will be. So why is this girl calling you by another name?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ricordando il Passato

**Author's Note:**

> probably not entirely in line with canon but there's tragic lesbians and that's canon enough for me
> 
> although i see sayaka as more bisexual/biromantic than anything else
> 
> you know what fuck it everyone is bi. everyone.

Your name is Oktavia von Seckendorff. It always has been.  It always will be.

But this girl is calling you by a different name.

"Sayaka!" she yells.

At least, that is what you think she is saying.  The music  _is_ very loud after all.  It drowns out your thoughts.

You cannot stand to be alone with your thoughts.

Ah, but how you love this melody, and your mind turns away from the intruder in your realm.  Your familiars will deal with her, and the useless burden she is bearing.  This is your favorite part of the symphony, and you sway in time with the music.  Eventually, you notice she is gone.  Good.  This song is for you and only you.

Time does not exist for you.  All there is, is music.  You are a mermaid, drifting on a current of sound, the notes tickling you like small fish, or seaweed.  The music is all you care about, it lightens the weight of the despair that birthed you. Your body is heavy, so very heavy, but you are weightless in water, aren't you?  In water and in sound, floating in crescendos and fortissimo.

But it's in a pianissimo that they come.  Two witch-hunters, the Puella Magi, and one frail human child.  What odd company she keeps.

You let your familiars deal with them again.  The human is now calling out that word instead of the Puella Magi from before.  Sayaka.  Sayaka.

They have interrupted your orchestra's performance and for that they must die.  It's quiet, so quiet without your music.  The silence is closing in around you, constricting you, crushing your body as if you were fathoms below the surface of the ocean, along with all the other grotesque creatures God made and never wished to look upon again.

You were born alone and you will die alone.  You are sure of that. The darkness of despair is oozing into every crevice of your brain now that the shield of music has dissipated.  You are angry, miserable, and alone.  Your actions resemble that of a trapped animal.

But you soon realize that no one is shouting anymore.  The crimson Puella Magi has undone her ribbon, allowing her hair to flow free like a river.  Her companions are trapped behind a barrier as she kneels in prayer and in the silence, you hear a small melody.  It's full of emotions you are afraid of.  A love with a purity creatures like you don't deserve.  Naivety? No.  It's hope.

There is no hope for you. But this girl is smiling so angelically in this hell of yours, you want to believe...You really want to believe...  

She's talking now.  You catch a few words, but only one stands out to you.  Sayaka.

You realize she is readying herself to kill you, even if it means sacrificing herself in the process.

One less Puella Magi then.

But doesn't death scare her?  You don't sense a single ounce of despair in the girl's soul. Only love as she continues to smile beatifically.

This girl is calling you out of your despair, but you want to wallow in your anguish and suffering because it's painful, but infinitely easier than struggling to find some sort of relief that would most likely vanish given time.

But time does not exist for you.  Isn't that right?  And this girl,this Puella Magi, this stranger

_Kyouko._

is beckoning you towards an eternal respite from your wretched grief.

There is a crack, you see her soul gem shatter and her body disintegrated with the force of her attack.  And in that moment, you remember.

You remember.

Your name is Sayaka Miki.  _That_ is your name.  It took your fall into complete and utter darkness to realize there was light in front of you the whole time. _  
_

And her name is Sakura Kyouko.

 

**Author's Note:**

> named after an Umineko song sung by Akiko Shikata, an artist/literal fucking goddess whose music style i REALLY LIKE. especially EXEC_FLIP_ARPHAGE from ar tonelico 3. fun fact, akiko (like yuki kajiura) sings in a made up language called hymmnos! and some of her songs tell a story, like Salavec Rhaplanca (another ar tonelico piece....can you tell i like that game?)
> 
> wow i will talk about this for hours if you let me (my tumblr url is even one of her song titles, my tumblr nickname is a shortened version of said song title and my penname, Lanii, was derived from...you get the idea...)
> 
> ugh i'm always so nervous about posting work like this, because i worry what if it reads too cliche, and purple prose-y and just overall seventh grade emo?
> 
> but then i remember madoka shouldering the burden of my despair and i post that shit anyway.


End file.
